"Don’t listen to those who say, you taking too big a chance. Michelangelo would have painted the Sistine floor, and it would surely be rubbed out by today. " ~~ Neil Simon
"You must realize that honorary degrees are given generally to people whose SAT scores were too low to get them into schools the regular way. As a matter of fact, it was my SAT scores that led me into my present vocation in life, comedy. " ~~ Neil Simon
"People with honorary awards are looked upon with disfavor. Would you let an honorary mechanic fix your brand-new Mercedes? " ~~ Neil Simon
"If you can go through life without experiencing pain you probably haven" ~~ Neil Simon
"Sports is the only entertainment where, no matter how many times you go back, you never know the ending." ~~ Neil Simon
"I love living. I have some problems with my life, but living is the best thing they”ve come up with so far. " ~~ Neil Simon